C: my mouse stopped working.
Rather odd that an optical mouse would fail in under several years. So I went on-site to check it out.
After inspecting her desk and the mouse, I found that she was, apparently, a rabid muffin fanatic and managed to cake enough pastry under the mouse buttons and in the scroll wheel to render the mouse useless.
Me: Ma’am I am going to need to replace your mouse
C: I just got this one.
Me: Well we have to replace it and I recommend that you no longer eat at you desk.