This really shouldn’t surprise you…..
Me:Y.E.S. how may I help you?
DosentListen: HELLO?
At this point I believe maybe I have my mic muted, nope, so I repeat my opening again.
DL: Yes, hello this is DL and I’m having issues with a training, it’s not loading and it says to check my pop up blocker but I don’t know how to do that.
Me: Okay ma’am I can definitely assist with getting this issue, I have a few things that I can try and if those don’t work I will escalate this to the proper team.
DL: OKAY! Good.
Yes she did raise her voice when she said that… every time she said that as well.
Me: Well first things first I’m going to need you to remote me into your computer so I can take a look at the problem.
DL: Sorry I’m an idiot, how do I do that?
Now, I’m used to hearing “I’m computer illiterate” or “I don’t understand computers” but never have I heard a user refer to themselves as an idiot.
Me: Well I need you to close all open windows.
DL: OKAY!
A few minutes go by and I don’t hear anything except for the sound of her breathing.
Me: Alright ma’am have you closed all the windows?
DL: You wanted me to close the windows?
Me:…Yes ma’am I need you to close all open windows.
DL: OKAY!
A few more minutes and I check back in, same thing and at this point I feel like she might not know how to close the windows so I verify with her.
Me: Ma’am do you know how to close the windows?
DL: You click the “X” at the top right of the screen right?
Me: Yes that’s right, can you please do that for me?
DL: OKAY! I did it.
Me: Wonderful, describe your screen to me.
DL: It’s my email.
Me: Ma’am I asked you to close all open windows.
DL: Oh, OKAY!
Another few minutes pass and I go through the same song and dance again til I finally get her on her desktop.
Me: Okay, now that you’re on your desktop I need you to click on the picture of my logo.
DL: OKAY!
Me: Let me know once you’ve done that.
DL: I can’t find it.
Me: I’m sorry?
DL: Can’t find it, isn’t here.
Me: Ma’am I need you to look again.
DL: OKAY!
Another moment goes by.
DL: Found it!
Me: Okay awesome, now click on it and let me know when you do.
DL: OKAY!
Me: Now follow the prompts on your screen.
DL: OKAY! Are you in now?
Me: No ma’am it takes a bit I’ll let you know when I’m remoted in.
DL: OKAY!
She proceeds to ask me this two more times, and I respond the same way each time. Once I’m in her computer I have her show me the issue. Sure enough the training video won’t load.
Me: Alright ma’am I have a few things I’m gonna try, so bear with me while I get those done.
DL: OKAY!
I verified once more that she had nothing else she needed to do and proceeded to do the troubleshooting. As I’m going through the steps I notice that the mouse isn’t responsive and it turns out the user was still trying to do things on her end.
Me: Ma’m I need you to stop moving the mouse on your end, it’s preventing me from doing the necessary troubleshooting.
DL: OKAY!
Again I go in circles with her a few times, and she just refuses to listen. After the fifth time however I got fed up and locked her mouse and keyboard inputs.
DL: Sir, sir! The mouse and keyboard aren’t working anymore I think there is something wrong with them.
Me: Nothing is wrong with them ma’am I locked your inputs so I could perform the troubleshooting. I will unlock it once I am done.
DL: OKAY!
Once again she must not have listened because she tells me five more times… It was at this point that I muted myself and introduced my head to my desk.
Once I finished the troubleshooting, I unlocked her controls and had her open her training. It opened and loaded no problems. I was thrilled that I was done, but she wanted to be sure that it worked.
Now my fellow readers how do you think she wanted to verify that it worked?
If you guessed she wanted me to remain on the line while she completed a 2 hour training then you are correct!
I of course told her that I cannot remain on the line for that long, and she actually listened. Then with one final “OKAY!” she ended the call.
